Thoughts on Letting Go

Letting go. Let go. Today i want to open up my hands and let go. Let go of what? you ask. I want to practice. letting go. Letting go of expectations. Letting go of the way things were supposed to be. Letting go of old behaviors. Letting go of anger. Towards others. Towards myself. Letting go of old, tired beliefs about my life. Letting go of unbelief.

Because here's the thing. Mostly, i want to let go of my need to escape. I want to escape every other day of my life. I want to escape any feelings of depression. Any feelings of feeling less than. I want to escape by using different things in my life. I love to escape through dating. Yep. I'll admit it. It's easy to lose sight of yourself when you can focus on the other person in the relationship. I like to escape using alcohol. Sometimes. I also really, really enjoy escaping through shopping. What. a. drug. Sometimes i escape through using food. Either too much or not enough.

Why am i sharing all of this with you? Because it's a step back toward finding my authentic self. Acknowledging my struggles and all. I'm also sharing this because i recently was reading a friend's blog and her honesty nearly had me in tears. I was so inspired. So validated. Grateful that i am not alone in this struggle through the 20s. Simply thankful.

And i'm thankful that i don't have to go off and join the circus. Atleast not today anyway. :)